Sunday, April 29, 2012

Promiscuity wanes? Why?

A recent op-ed in the NYT "Caring, Romantic American Boys" waxes poetically about how endearing it is that young boys are becoming more careful about their sexual initiation invoking visual comparisons to rom-com "The 40 year old Virgin".    But this article points out another obvious motivation - fear.   One boy says (perceptively);
“I could be screwed for the rest of my life.” Another boy said he did not want to have sex yet for fear of becoming a father before his time."
 And clearly:
"the American boys I interviewed seemed more nervous about the consequences of sex than American girls."
 Uhh - ya!  And they have probably have some real-life experience to draw from as in today's divorce culture children rarely have contact with their biological fathers.  So perhaps fear is behind rates of sexual initiation  dropping from 60% to 42% since 1988.

But I am not surprised that the decline for girls is less - as this only reinforces the "You Go Girl" attitude on reproductive rights.  Abortions are readily available and so keeping a child is upto the girl.  Typically a strong psychic reward is also available to girls/young women who have children.

But more importantly, this plays into the popular refrain about "Manning-Up" - the perpetual whine that boys are not evolving into marriageable men.  But if "Romantic Boys" never overcome their "fear of sex" then women will have trouble gaining husbands. And men who aren't interested in marriage also have less incentive to be productive workers or responsible fathers (a report I read recently suggested married men earned 19% more than non-married* men. *As distinct to un-married but in a marriage-like relationship.).

A reason for "failure to launch" indeed is the lopsided, unfair way women denigrate men - pure and simple.


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